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On Saturday we hit the Portland Nursery Apple Tasting. Here are some pictures of Ethan enjoying the kids activities at the event. We collected some apples, all these crazy varieties you can’t get at the store, went to check out and it was only 4 bucks! So we’ll be going back for more this Sunday, and to hear Cana Son, our favorite local Cuban band. (I blogged about them at the event last year here.)

P.S. Ethan said he wanted to be an “Otis” dog for his face painting and went around telling people he was a “pug nosed pup”! I love this kid! (no one had the heart to tell the kid painting his face that he was doing an AWFUL job, lol)

I know, I know, two posts in one day, but these are short and sweet so hey.

I just wanted to describe to you what it was like today on my first bike ride in almost a year.

The day is beautiful, clear skies, chilly temps. The trees are just beginning to turn colors and the air was crisp and light. Verity has impeccable head control and is ready to ride in the trailer with big brother, lots of padding, and only urban land beneath the wheels (no bumps).

The wind going passed my face, feeling limber and strong on my bike (actually, Lacey’s since I sold mine last month) – it was nothing short of glorious. Knowing I could get somewhere faster than my feet or the bus, yet with scenery, fresh air, and silence (as opposed to being stuck in a car with a whiney 4 year old and wailing 4 month old!) Chris and I were agreed: you feel like you can CONQUER THE WORLD. Complete freedom to go down one way lanes, go where ever you want to go, ahhhhhh… There is NOTHING like being on the bike. It’s perfection.

Also, in recent news, Verity’s first meals! She’s been eating mashed bananas and steamed/mashed sweet potatoes at her new (adorable, vintage, $20 at Rerun) high chair! Below are some pics, as well as Ethan and Verity passed out in the bike trailer

This look of hers is eerily similar to me as a baby!

Stuffing face, good times

Asleep in the trailer.

I’ve been trying to stay ahead of a cold for about a week or so now. It’s been fairly easy, but I can feel my body fall behind it a bit when I get too little sleep or eat something sugary, which I did the last two days in a row (darn that new bakery and their delicious coconut macaroon!) … (and darn that the movie “Away We Go” was so darn cute that I stayed up til 2am to watch it!)

So I’m slowing down. I’m sipping “Tonic” tea, a blend from the Alberta Co-Op that includes green tea with herbs and spices like cardamom, ginger, cinnamon, mullein (great for sinuses), cloves, etc. My raw honey mask is on my face and I might rub some essential oil into my feet before bed too. I need to sleep deeply tonight.

Speaking of sleep, I have a post coming all about the different herbs traditionally used for sleep and relaxation aids, so you have that to look forward to.

In the meantime, the NoPo (north portland) Home Group harvest party kickoff was at our place tonight and we squeezed into our living room. It was really encouraging to hear where everyone was coming from and what they wanted out of it: authenticity, real relationships, friends, spiritual depth. There was an agreement that we would not do workbooks or sign agreements in our group. Ever. Instead we’ll do potluck dinners twice a month and a movie night once a month (”film and theology” – esque). I’m really looking forward to getting to know this group of folks over the next year…

I’m feeling emotional better than Sunday, but still kinda hormonal. I think it has to do with lack of sleep more than anything, though there are certainly some heartaches I am enduring from time to time. It’s like how sometimes an aspect of living is really grueling but in the larger scheme of things its all going in a positive direction.

I was thinking about that today, when I was changing Verity’s diaper. She was wailing and so upset with me because she was also very hungry, but I knew that I had to endure that so when she DID get to nurse her diaper would be clean and she could fall asleep, rather than half comfortable with poop stuck to her butt. I know only a mom would get that, lol, but I seriously thought about how God must feel that way with us sometimes! I can certainly be like the wailing, hungry infant who can’t see the logic in getting my diaper changed And the air on my butt is so cold!!! WAHHHHHH!!!

Back to my tonic, my work, and eventually, my SLEEP! Yoga class tomorrow morning, thankyoujeebus.

Everyday I work out the kinks of my life;
Breathe into them, feel them loosen.
It’s hard work, all this working.

Sometimes I grumble and complain.
Sometimes I boast in my own capabilities.
Sometimes I just fall over and give up.

I work out the kinks of my career,
learn new things that make my brain want to POP.
I work out the kinks of my heart,
learn new things that make my soul want to POP.

Even rest often feels like work:
taxing, stretching, challenging, moving, producing.

Today my work looked like this:

The challenge of getting myself and two young kids
ready to brace a chilly Fall morning, then
– catch the MAX, transfer to the bus –
Go to a yoga class,
Have a work meeting through lunchtime,
Carry my 20 pound baby 4 miles home because we don’t have change for the bus.
Break up the cock fights that burst forth every 2 minutes between Chris and Ethan,
Convince everyone to be civil,
Lose my civility by the 3rd mile (survival now: LET’S JUST MAKE IT HOME!)
Home for dinner: feed the baby, feed the preschooler, feed the husband, feed the mommy.
Get Ethan showered, Get baby showered, Get mommy showered.
Read 2 books, kiss Ethan goodnight.
Nurse for the umpteenth time today.
Work another few hours on random projects that have been on the backburner for friends.
Try to get to sleep at a decent hour…

Tomorrow work might look different:
a 9am – 2pm shift on the laptop,
learning things that make my brain want to go POP.
Followed by
grocery shopping,
cooking,
hosting a Harvest Party for our newly forming homegroup…

The next day, work will look different again, and then again…

Mixed through all of this work is internal work: prayers, self-talk, counseling, relationship building…

Even sleep is work: I work away the tensions of the day, I wake to nurse several times, I soothe a stuffy nosed baby, half-asleep rocking upright on my bed until she falls back asleep…

This is a season, a season for lots of hard work. They come, they go. Maybe winter will be restful: lots of painting, journaling, knitting, naps…

Since there are a teeny tiny few things on my mind between work this week, I will fill you in on what exactly those things might be.

First, YOGA. MamaZen (and if you scroll the pics, I’m actually in a few of them, can you guess who I am?) Have you heard enough about them yet? Well, in 3 weeks doing their practice 2 times a week and a home practice daily, I have lost 7 pounds. Yes, I’ve also been eating a highly nourishing diet like I described here. With some cookies on the side Anyway, I love them (mamazen). I’ve been feeling myself grow more strong and toned, which is a boost to the self-confidence after your body is wrecked by childbirth! My energy and spirits have been up, which is a very good thing given that my daily life with the kids, work, and marriage in recovery is DRAINING to say the least. Here are some of my favorite poses that have been helpful in conjunction of course with a rhythmic breathing through holding the poses (til I am burning and sweating and think my muscles can take it no longer ) These images are from the “sequence” I built using the handy home practice builder on yogajournal.com.

Second, speaking of energy and spirits (no, not THAT kind. Though a good mojito now and then doesn’t hurt), I will be adding some essential oils (PDF) to the family’s general well being very soon. Young Living, if you haven’t read all about it over at the experts blog, aka my roomate Lacey, is a therapeutic grade oil (as opposed to basic aromatherapy oils “over the counter” whose process of refinement destroys most if not all of the medicinal properties of the original plant). I’ve been using Lacey’s stash here and there with excellent results and lately benefited even further from the essential oil “adjustment” the yoga instructor gives everyone while in Savasana at the end of the practice. Since the weather is turning and having certain oils burning in the electric burner have been a major relief for us battling seasonal depression through the winter months, I’ve decided to get a few from Young Living for skin application that are meant to aid in processing emotions, so on. I’ve encouraged Lacey to write more about this line in her blog so keep checking her out for the real low down

Next on the list: skin. I’ve been hoping for some skin change since eating such reduced carbs and sugars, adding anti-inflammatory foods, and practicing yoga. I’ve been drinking tea each day with beneficial herbs (like dandelion root to support the liver and a few others) and of course doing the plethora of probiotics found in kefirs and kombucha. While I noticed my skin was not getting WORSE, it wasn’t getting too much better (yet, I mean its only been 3 weeks though!). But here’s where things get interesting. I remembered reading about an anti-inflammatory, anti-bacterial raw skin mask you can make at home from raw unfiltered honey and spices like turmeric, cloves and cayenne. I hadn’t tried it yet but while in Chicago my colleague and I were talking about raw honey and she pointed out that she has a one week shelf life, refrigeration only honey mask she finds at Lush. Sure enough its got those ingredients in it. Back home, I’ve been doing this mask once a day and holy crap. In the morning my skin is more moisturized, exfoliated, even-toned and smooth. Raw honey is known for doing all these things and more (healing scars, killing germs, so on), so I’m not surprised that it works, just how GOOD it works. So note to those of you who have any sort of skin problem! Try the Vivian raw honey/turmeric/cloves/cayenne skin mask!

As we proceed further down the list: Upcoming events. Tomorrow the homeschool group gathers at our place for an apple themed meet up. In honor of the theme, everyone is bring potluck items featuring apples in the ingredients. Today Ethan, Caleb and I juiced 5 pounds of organic apples, adding fresh ginger, cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg and allspice, and popped in the water kefir to start brewing batch of amazingly healthy homemade sparkling apple cider. With the pulp from the juicer I made a quick apple bunt cake and topped it with a homemade pumpkin cream cheese icing. All sweetened with only raw honey, of course. I also have several pounds of apple chicken sausages to cook up in the morning for our guests.

Tomorrow evening is family movie night, this one being kinda special. We’ve been promising Ethan a viewing of the Disney version of Alice in Wonderland, complete with an “Unbirthday Party” with cake and tea. Saturday is a friend’s 5th birthday party at the pumpkin patch – very exciting. I could go on but since there is like an event ever single day this month, I’ll save all that for another post, or two!

And speaking of family, every one is doing pretty good. I don’t want to speak for Hubby because he does have his own blog, after all, lol, but suffice to say that he has been having a hard time. He newly began therapy which has been intense, while trying to start his own business and feeling less active since not riding his bike to and from work each day. He’s had low points in his recovery lately which is difficult for us, but at the same time we are talking more and he seems to now be working harder at staying where he needs to be emotionally and spiritually. We had a yoga class together earlier this week that was really fun too!

Okay, well back to work. I’ll post some pics this weekend after some of the festivities…

Well, I did it! I Raced for the Cure! I got up early this morning and ran the timed 5k with my lovely 4 running mates, including one crazy pink haired mama

The pictures came out SUPER awkward, esp since I look like I’m doing the pee pee dance. It was cold at 6:30 this morning!

How did it go? I got my period while running, that’s how. By mile 2 I could tell things were, well, uh, flowing. And the pms cervical cramps came right on time too. I think my IUD made it worse, I seriously felt like I was going into labor, lol. So I walked from about 2 miles in for maybe a .5 mile stretch and then ran the last part again, timing around 39 minutes, lol. I’m still happy with it though, it was about having fun and we sure did! Also, I wore a pink sign on my back honoring my friend who passed away. It was sad to see young girls running with “In memory of my mom” on their backs. Though we were having fun, I was sobered by the reality of this disease. It’s heartbreaking.

So here we are, being nerds. (Okay, I’m the only nerd.) After are some other pictures.

Enjoy!

For some reason I want to add that we all appear much thinner in real life. This photo added 20 pounds to each of us LOL

Yeah, that’s me dancing in the background of this accidental pic, with Nicole in the foreground tying her shoes. Sigh. I have WAY too much energy at all the WRONG times.

Misty with her crazy pink hair. Me with my crazy pink face.

Ethan in my “Race for the Cure” cape. (Is it just me or is this pose a little… feminine?)

Verity playing in the kids room at church this morning

Off the needles: Finally finished this Ostrich Plume Shawlet (in wool and silk yarn) for Lacey this week.

Verity fell asleep in the back position in the Ergo while in the back yard picking tomatoes the other day. When I took off the Ergo she stayed fast asleep on my back, so we had to shoot this funny picture.

THAT’S ALL FOLKS. I might be quiet this week as I’m working a TON and flying to Chicago on Wed.

a.k.a. the Friday home school group that began this summer. (Not pictured: Misty and her kids, darn it!) But the rest of us are here and we took a group shot today at park time for our yahoo group page. These kids are some of Ethan’s bestest buds and I’m so happy to have found this lovely group of diverse women! (Chris is at most of our gatherings and entertains the kids, so he was told he HAD to be in the group shot too, lol. I secretly think he is the most fantastic of all men )

This is an awesome article! I couldn’t agree more with the absurdity of conditional parenting, and I know I have a long way to go before I am really realizing my ideals as a mother but I’m growing more confident in my goals each day. So woot!

You know what else is awesome?! MamaZen. I can’t say enough about the free class I took this morning (they were shooting photos for their website so it was free). Ethan’s old “playschool” teacher was the class teacher and the space and offerings at this place are just amazing. Not to mention the wonderful workout I got, which warmed up and BURNED muscles I didn’t know existed, got my heartrate up, sweat dripping, and I felt all flexible and warmed up by the time it was over. Back pains I’ve been having were almost gone. It was amazing. If you live in the Portland area, please check them out. They’re adding new classes and events all the time. GREAT group of ladies. –> http://www.mamazenpdx.com

I just got back from a community dinner with our friends down the street. The vegan potluck features many delicious meals which I scooped out by the heapfuls and piled on a small dessert plate for Ethan and I to munch on. But just when I thought I had it comfortably full, I turned around and noticed THREE MORE dishes on the stove! What to do?!

Boy, this is life, zapped into this little kitchen surrounded by amazing opportunities. Choosing what I want on my plate is definitely one of the major themes this month.

Within just a few weeks of Verity’s birth, I already began working (from home) again and within a month I was starting to be involved in Ethan’s homeschooling and joined a Friday homeschool group. I tried to be cautious about my involvement and commitment level to the various offers out there, from putting in time with my local church to taking on more roles (and hours, and even new clients) in my business, to starting a 3x a week running schedule to do the 5k this Sunday, to signing up for random things like mommy and me yoga on Wed. and Sat. and Village Home classes on Tuesday and quickly, quickly, I am realizing, my schedule got FULL.

SO full, in fact, that when I turn around and notice all the pots still on the stove, I have no more room and things begin to overlap and fall off. Not good.

Fact of the matter is, I am a mom with 2 young kids; one who is an infant and one who is homeschooled by yours truly. I work between 20-40 hours a week, depending on the work flow, from home with only my darling husband as “childcare”. I often work a few long days per week and then other days all night, in order to make up for the days I must take off to participate in field trips and community events and so on. Oh, and let’s not forget spending a tad of my time with my “intentional community” at the Kenton House and, of course, my husband and marriage (and weekly counseling and reading material and all those things that come with that!) And then there’s the wee time to blog, or knit, or watch a movie, or have tea with friends. You get the picture.

The point is, my time is valuable. And there is a time for everything under the sun. And it is all meaningless. LOL (okay, that was a tad out of context, but sometimes it feels that way, heh? Solomon certainly was wise!)

Where am I going with this? Here it is –

Today was Ethan’s first day of school at Village Home. We were SO looking forward to it. Here’s how it went:

Up working til passed midnight last night, nursed twice in the night, woke up at 7:30am to get kids dressed, ran out just before 9am with no breakfast (the kitchen was too full) so we ran to Posies, ate our breakfast in the car on the way, got there (in Beaverton) 5 minutes late. Got to class 10 minutes late.

First class of the day? Word World. Hmmm, how do I sum this up? The teacher mainly passed out worksheets. The lowlight of this was when another mother did Ethan’s FOR him. Yes, she sat there and told him every single answer to a worksheet he already knew how to do, not even letting him guess himself. I suppose his size deemed he needed the help but I was stunned silent and didn’t know what to do. I actually had to walk out of the room! I was like, if I’m going to spend an hour watching my son do TWADDLE, at least let him do it himself! lol Then a story was read, Blueberries for Sal, which we’ve been reading allllll summer long. Then they did another worksheet and colored in things that are blue. What? This is a $50 class (for the semester). So that was a little of a bummer, but I was still hopeful.

Then there was Move and Groove, a dance class. Ethan was very shy about moving about and following the teacher. He constantly wanted to be up at the front, talking to instructors, rather than following along. I watched him pick his nose on the sidelines for about 20 minutes (I’m not kidding, either, he dug out some good ones) before I was able to pass off the baby to Chris so I could go do ALL the dancing activities WITH him for another 40 minutes. It was fun, but I will not be able to do that each week, as the morning classes were going to be the hubby’s duty and the afternoon classes were going to be my duty. So this was definitely not a permanent solution. And I definitely felt that he was not that interested in the class, AT ALL.

The highlight of the day was meeting up with a home school mom from our Friday group and her son and going out to lunch (Korean, yum!). We rushed back for “Knitting” which was basically a small group of knitters, over half of whom were tweens learning for the first time. Ethan was frustrated doing his finger knitting in front of people and ended up practicing his “common words” flash cards instead. I was beginning to feel like this exhausting day was not really worth our time, or our money, but I wanted to get through the last class.

Organic Gardening. This is perhaps the best class of the day, which involves an instructor answering our questions that come up about our home gardens all the while we are weeding and planting and what not a space at the school with two small raised beds. It was fun – but alas. We have a garden at home. We do this every day. Do we need to travel 3 hours both ways via lightrail and spend our entire day here for that?

So we finally get home at about 4:30. I promptly start the meal for the vegan potluck and Ethan is a great little cook with me, helping me clip the tips of the green beans, par-boil them, add the cherry tomatoes and stir in the dressing. I talked to him about the day.

He says he enjoyed himself. He says he wants to go back. And I know on some level he does. This is hard!

But I asked him if he wanted to hit a storytime each week at the library like we used to instead of going to the reading class for a story, and that we’ll still see William and Brianna several times a week for playdates and our Friday group. I remind him that we dance together everyday, so we can still do this at home, as well as garden and knit. But if he REALLY wants to keep going on Tuesdays, I say, then okay – I’ll keep trying to make it work.

In the end, he admits that he could do without the Tuesday school day, in exchange for the dancing, knitting, gardening and reading we already do anyway, integrated into our daily life so effortlessly.

This was all such an odd experience. I thought I would love starting this little “homeschool” classes day, but I realized even more why I chose to do what I do: Because learning is so alive, so vivid, so individual; Because peers should be mixed ages, mixed abilities, mixed walks of life; Because life should be organic and integrated and rhythmic- not a rush and a squeeze and a stress; Because our time should be FULL with not only wonderful activities but also plenty of open slots for spontaneity, generosity — even so-called “inconveniences”!

I end the day right now reflecting on how grateful I am to live the life I do. I love that Ethan’s classroom is the world, his teachers are all around him and his learning happens constantly. He thrives in it and he’s confident in it, he has dear friends as well as casual playmates. Upon carrying bags full of plums from our tree to our neighbors yesterday, it occured to me that he also has a “grandpa and grandma” figure right next door, as well as “Aunts” a few doors down from him, with dogs he gets to play with since he doesn’t have one, lol. (Chickens I can handle. Dogs? No.)

In Portland, we are building, (ever so slowly sometimes!) a surrogate family – complete with odd characters, clumsy experiences, and — eventually — roots. A few weeks ago I was seriously at my wits end with homesickness and wondering if I should just pack it up and move in with in-laws back in Florida!!! But since “hanging in there”, I see evidence each new day that we are here for a reason and that things are actually going quite well.

So long as I can keep my plate open enough for community experiences that matter, I think we’ll do just fine.

(On a related note, our Kenton House will be the new NoPo – the short name for North Portland- Home Group at Evergreen! I am very excited to get some more intimate and smaller experiences with a group of great people while we shares meals — and lives– together. Pray for us!)

Ethan’s been singing the Milo and Otis theme song for DAYS.ON.END. (hence the title of this post). We took many a walks outside this weekend while camping, which included the usual and unusual conversations and play and laughter around meals and bonfires (including one very, very huge one) with old friends and new friends, lots of meals, trails, and even an amazing puppet show (courtesy of Heath, of course) and a tour of a farmhouse/museum (way to slide some “unschooling” in there!).

We are all pretty exhausted (WHAT? You mean I didn’t sleep that well in a cold tent with a deflating queen sized air mattress squished between a 4 year old and a nursing infant and a snoring husband who weighs more than the 3 of us combined so we roll towards his side the whole night??? Didn’t those EAR PLUGS WORK? Ya don’t say?!)

Pictures tell the rest:

Okay, this first one is from the night before camping but isn’t she too cute always sticking her tongue out?

Here we go now with the camping:

Raise your hand if you’re the one who ate all the blackberries!

My friend Katie was my angel helping entertain baby while I cooked!

This is my favorite picture of the shadow puppet show, Ethan with buds William and Brianna. (Can you guess the story? Where the Wild Things Are!) Below is a slideshow with more pics from the puppet theatre and massive bonfire.