{{Before I go on, let me take a moment to apologize for the wordy length of this post. Sorry. Also, you will be rewarded with pictures at the end. But don’t skip ahead just because I told you that, because the content explains the pictures. (gotcha!) }}

I began reading some really excellent financial books that have given me some valuable ideas and resources, but most importantly the validation that living a life of frugality is indeed a freeing and valid choice (however un-American it feels at first!). The topic is exhaustive so I won’t go into all the details, but some resources for me have been primarily Radical Homemakers (my go-to!), Your Money or Your Life, and recently The Scavenger’s Manifesto, Made from Scratch and the Tightwad Gazette (check these out at your library!). There is so much about it that fascinates me as a subject matter and lifestyle choice, as it takes a certain amount of confidence to transcend the idea that voluntary simplicity (and foraging/scavenging/bartering/waiting/and often going without) is a deprived, resource-less, bohemian (though this word might actually be appropriate) life of poverty (or worse – laziness).

I can acutely feel the pressure, on many fronts, to just forget this whole business of living simply and just get a job job, put Ethan in public school, and force myself onto that hamster wheel because what I’m faced with if I do not do so seems too exhausting, lonely, challenging, and doomed-from-the-start. But I have never been one to unquestionably accept the status quot solution without at least researching and utilizing some alternatives that don’t compromise my heart’s values and desires.

To view the lifestyle instead as a challenge in resourcefulness and ingenuity and invention (the daughter of necessity?), a call to radically reject the consumer cycle (as the Scavenger Manifesto calls it, the “Want-Get” mentality) of materialism and waste and the myth of “choices”, and to capitalize on the lack of excess as a catalyst for gaining increased self-sufficiency and experience.

It’s been heavy at times, as I sit with the reality of compulsive choices I have made, the “treats” I wanted to “deserve” over the years and the financial pressures we have incurred both from our own choices or those of the “down economy”. While I have never had what I would have called affluence, often forgoing large things like extra vehicles or a house with more space than I need or vacations or store-bought clothes, I had to recognize that we had made choices with where what little money we had fell between the cracks (where did it go?!) on silly things like convenience food (i.e. “oh, we are going to the library, we’ll stop and grab bagels first”), expensive cheeses (next I need to learn how to be a foodie on a budget!), library fines, shipping fees, so on.

Our plan to move to Columbia and for Chris to take this flexible, enjoyable, sustainably-minded, locally-owned job was a calculated risk and I am in no way making it work without flaws just 4 weeks into this venture… *yet*. For our entire marriage I have worked (I’ve held a job since I was 14, for that matter), I financed over 90% of my private-education undergrad degree with grants/scholarships and work credits, and since having children I have been the main earner generating income from my own at-home business. Yet, for a variety of reasons I have shared in the past on this blog, we have been taking steps to switch these roles for sometime now, as continuing down that path left me stressed, strapped, unorganized, unhappy, and unable to homeschool. So I knew there would be sacrifices, but the idea that I could creatively figure this out was incredibly motivating for me and continues to be as I think of new ways to live and think about the choices we can make to realize this “dream” of living simply, learning more, feeling more enriched and fulfilled by a life of time and resources to live generously — while making as a household income less than we have EVER earned before, even while in college.

So rather than recount the unexpected bills and financial upsets to our last 4 weeks (though there have indeed been those too!), I want to move on to the fun stuff, the things that I am finding just slap-knee exciting about learning to be a tight-wad!

First of all, I think being frugal is a lot easier if you live amongst other frugals; in community with swappers, food growers, barterers, pickers, foragers, forgoers, and coupon-clippers. It kinda validates the lifestyle, which is definitely counter-cultural otherwise. I think these folks exist just about everywhere, you just gotta find them — and be willing to be their equal.

Secondly, there are a lot of hidden perks to being frugal that, if you can let go of the concept of “Want-Get” mentality, are pretty rad. Clothing swaps with stylishly-dressed donators are fun and easy. Garage sales and “free bins” amaze me. Bartering goods and services is highly effective. Learning a new skill so you don’t have to pay some one to do it for you is way more satisfying. Paying only a quarter of your previous monthly vehicle gasoline budget when every one on the news is lamenting the climbing gas prices is reassuring. Having even just a few bucks left over at the end of the week, rather than going into more debt, is rewarding. Learning to wait for something you would have just ran out to get as soon as you “needed” it, like a washer/bike/freezer/radio/whatever until you have saved for it and found the right deal (hopefully free!) fosters a feeling of contentment and relaxation, a mindfulness about accumulating goods. Keeping track of receipts, organizing bills, and forgoing “treats” is, well, it’s growing up, (and it also reducing a BUTTLOAD of anxiety at the end of a pay cycle! who knew? )

I will be posting again a weekly series I call Simple Pleasures – a record of things that were bartered, gifted, thrifted, made, grown, saved for, or given away that brought pleasure to my life each week:

Things like…

A family walk to the public library (which boasts NO limits and NO late fees!), where we forage for edible dandelions and violets, sight a groundhog, and work off belly fat – who needs a gym membership when you have legs?!). Our ten dollar weekly budget that gets us 2 gallons of raw milk and 2 pints of raw cream (homemade cream cheese!) every Monday on our neighbor’s doorstep. The bags FULL of amazing books, music and documentaries we bring back from the library. The free use of internet around town. The free movies we rent for family movie night at 9th Street Video because Chris works at Uprise. The free (local) coffee both Chris and I get from Uprise while renting the free movies at 9th street, on our way to getting the free books from the library. The knitted gifts to trade for babysitting. The free movie tickets on our date night and the $5 (total) we spent for the organic wine and beer we enjoyed while watching the movie. The outings of packed lunches at the park and nature trails just outside the city. The Easter baskets filled with sprouted wheat grass (seeds a gift from a friend) and sales on the organic bulk bin candy which filled saved egg shells from breakfast. The downright gourmet meals that can be made with a friends’ surplus garden grub and bulk natural foods from Azure Standard. The upcoming “Columbia’s Really Really Free Market” and the free backyard chicken processing workshop I will attend in the coming weeks (bringing home the bird for dinner!). The fishing I will take up this summer to catch a good supply of trout and the harvest I will reap and keep from my garden beds, whose compost was generously gifted to us in exchange for a half dozen of our chicken eggs and the tomato and pepper starts donated to us from the local urban farms surplus, (thank you Luke!)

… you get the idea. SIMPLE pleasures that offset some of the difficulties we have faced, and brought meaning and blessing to my life in often surprising ways.

It’s really quite fun to get even crazier!

This little home economics notebook from 1917 that I found at a thrift store was really inspiring. I’m fascinated with homemakers of the bygone era, who made due with as little as 1,200 yearly salary. Had to take a picture (but not buy! lol)

A virtually free (did have to spend a little money on the sweets), hand-made Easter tradition…

Easter brunch of whatever is on hand – quail eggs (a gift from sweet friend Natalie), fruit, plain yogurt with raw honey…

A simple park outing can be entertaining, fun, and even a bit of a break… at no cost at all!

Who needs a mall playground (without actually intending it, we haven’t stepped foot in a shopping mall in over 2 years and counting!) when you have nature trails, dandelions to blow, rocks to throw in a creek, and bridges to run across?!

I typically walk out of the library with armloads of books, as there are no limits, no late fees, and a great selection. This week’s focus was homeschooling resources…

Free meals during his shift, Chris enjoys free freshly made artisan sandwiches with locally raised meat sources, along with a glass of organic beer, 5-6 times per week. I have been impressed with how this has reduced the amount of groceries we go through each week! (gosh, his job sure sounds terrible, doesn’t it? )

Family dance jams are a nice way to pass the time…

Foraged edibles from the front yard – violets, dandelion flowers and leaves – beautiful, free nourishment

Diggin in dirt rarely gets old… finding worms, black beetles, grubs and cicada’s is just too fun!

“new” used books from the library used book sale

Tire swings from the tires just replaced on the car – endless hours of entertainment (I’ve lovingly nicknamed this swing Jenna the Babysitter)

This old suitcase ($1) and milk glass saucer (.25) from the end of a garage sale now serves as my undergarment storage and homemade salad dressing dispenser (respectively)

Big pile of great Spring sweaters (free from a clothing swap)

$1 garage sale vintage lamp base that just whispers my name…

Doll clothes found in a “free” basket!

A frugal “pantry” of bulk foods, collected eggs, and home brews…

A vintage typewriter for my prose (free in exchange for me learning to tinker with it and get a new ribbon)

I won’t share the whole fiasco today involving my car and a moment of OHMYGOD-it’s-dead, followed by my OH-DUH-I’m-just-out-of-gas realization after I had dramatized the situation and shed some tears and all that embarrassing stuff. We’ll just leave it at that.

Suffice it to say, I seem to be hitting the same road signs again and again lately (wait, am I going in circles?!), and most of them go something like, “CHILL OUT. TRUST ME. I HAVE A PLAN!”

But I digress.

In other news, we welcomed 4 new members (1 is hiding in the other corner in the photo below) to our urban homestead today, and I can’t say enough about how cute, cute, CUTE these little gals (hopefully!) are! Ethan summed it best when he said, “Oh my gosh, I don’t know but every time I look at them it’s like I’m going to cry because they are just so cute!”

Meet…

Stormy, the barred rock chick, smallest of the quartet, who is spunky, loud and dodges being held like the plague. Her eggs will be brown, similar to our current laying hens, Magic and Daffodil (a Rhode Island Red and Gold-Sex Link, respectively).

Nutmeg, who narrowly escaped the hatchery box to head home with our lot when Chris chimed in that this was his favorite and we kicked out a cute little copper-colored one to make room for this little speckled Americauna. All I can say after careful observation is that Nutmeg is a good eater. I’m not surprised her and Chris felt a connection.

Lulla, another Americauna whose coloring looks slightly like Nutmeg, but with unmistakable chipmunk-like markings rather than speckles (at least thus far, on her chick down – the eventual adult feathers could be quite different!). Ethan named her Lullaby, which we shortened to Lulla. She is robust and docile and seems to mind her own business.

And lastly, my personal fav, is Celeste, a little fluffy angelic cream-colored Americauna with nice green hues to her legs (a sign of good “easter egg” blueish/green eggs which are the signature of Americauna’s, like Nutmeg and Lulla as well). She happens to be the biggest (or just fluffiest) of the bunch and is quiet, sleepy, and seems to not mind being held in the least. She falls asleep in your palm almost immediately. I’ve seen her prance around and eat her fill, but her general demeanor is calm and chill.

I just love chick-raising time of year. This is the 3rd time we’ve brooded chicks and it’s beginning to feel like an annual rite of passage in April. I love watching them, so little for such a very short amount of time, as they provide endless entertainment. Soon they’ll be sprouting larger, darker feathers and looking all gaggly like awkward teenagers and attempting to fly out of their brooding box.

I am crossing my fingers that this group continues down an all-female path (roosters are a no-go in city limits). And I can’t wait, CANNOT WAIT I TELL YOU, for the day that I reach into the nest box and pull out a colorful selection of brown and easter-blue eggs!

I have a special affinity for easter eggers (Americauna’s or Araucana’s). Last month I purchased a dozen eggs at the co-op from a local farm, that upon opening I was enthralled to find every single one a various shade of creamy blue and green hues! I waited a week before cracking them because they were so beautiful. And the yolk is always extra yellow, making scrambled eggs look sort of neon! Even after eating them, I saved a few shells to make some dear friends some beeswax egg candles:

Other than bringing home baby chicks today, I’m happy to report that we got our bazillion loads of laundry done at the laundry mat yesterday (no more fights with the drying lines – for now), and we spent a few hard-working hours in the sun yesterday putting up the chicken run. We clipped the hens wings (they’re rockin’ flyers, but they need to stay lower and confined to their run, for our neighboring yard is full of dogs) and made an area for the compost heap and hanging feeder, as well as a new nesting box made of a storage tote with a hole cut out of the lid (non-wood means less worry about mites). We also recycled one of our used tires as a dusting box for the hens (nice size and the “lip” on the top helps them bathe without kicking up too much dust into their face). They were flippin’ out to have a sunny day to throw a new bag of sand around and scratch up a newly forming pile of winter leaves and rotting kitchen scraps. Seriously, who needs TV when you have these critters to watch?!

Ethan is ever enjoying his new mama-made hoola hoop:

Ver sporting her mama-knitted “spring” cap:

And enjoying the tree swing immensely:

Spring has sprung in our yard with a lone yellow tulip:

Ethan finding himself a bright palette of Springtime colors in his watercoloring:

I snagged the best swing jumping photo ever, of Luke and Natalie our Columbia friendies, at our picnic last Sunday at Lake Stephens Park:

Pots of coffee are now brewed in this old stainless steel percolator that I snatched up for 20 bucks at a resale store several years ago and just recently decided to put to good use. Still works great! (and check out the lovely jar of raw cream from a local pastured dairy farm – just $1.75!)

Another highlight this week was a rare seafood dinner (seafood is a little pricey when you are landlocked as we are here); I scored some wild caught salmon (frozen, but beggers can’t be choosers, eh?) on major sale, so this evening the kids and I feasted on blood oranges and rosemary salmon fillets with amaranth and steamed edamame to compliment.

So that’s the newsy news. I am going back to my books and raw milk maple steamer, while listening to the sound of wittle bitty chirps float through the air…

A day like this, with no one down from the latest viruses that float around this great green and blue earth, has been few and far between. Linens were hung outside in the sunny 40 degree mid-day, chickens stayed out from dawn til dusk soaking it up, Ethan climbed a tree while the baby slept. And today was a day of learning. Ethan was very productive with all the things he got done, his reading and history and math and language lessons. I even let him do a computer game (Magic School Bus explores the Rainforest!), which is not exactly in our typical “way” to homeschool, but it seemed like a nice treat after a day spent on books and rulered paper and chalkboards…

Ethan. He is something else. In the quiet of our own home, he has truly begun to make changes in the way he relates to me, his respect and empathy and self-control. He is still incredibly energetic around new people, and continues to have a difficult time waiting his turn to speak, but the way in which he has been maturing these last few weeks has been truly a blessing to me. It has made our days much more enjoyable, our relationship much more sustainable, and even his dad and sister are relating better to him as he takes on the “air” of a 6 year old (who even lost his first tooth recently!!!). There are successes and failures, learning experiences, for us both. Parenting 24/7 is a colorful journey of ups and downs, to say the least.

And I’m not sure which came first, the chicken or the egg, but I’m also feeling — in general — much calmer, less rushed, more playful and quiet-toned, than I have in years. Giving up on devoting a major chunk of my day to income generating work has been a long-time coming, but I can still hardly believe how good it feels to flow about my day managing my household, attempting to catch up on the constant stream of childrens’ needs and wants, without the demands and pressures of an outside job zapping my reserves of time, energy, and patience out from under me. On top of not devoting major hours each day to working from home, I have also not been drinking caffeine, replaced now for THREE weeks with calming handcrafted herbal tea, high quality foods and supplements of vitamins and minerals that support my weak liver, foggy brain, and wacky hormonal glands. It’s been an interesting time, despite catching colds and this and that, because I have a very distinct mood elevation these last few weeks and I must say — I rather like feeling happy

As I blogged about recently, Chris and I ventured up through the snow to Columbia, MO this last weekend. The drive was wonderful, both times, and allowed us a great time of conversation we’ve been needing to catch up on. Our friends we stayed with were marvelous hosts in the most charming of homes, and the time we spent with them was lovely. Even though I caught Ver’s stomach bug of last week and spent most of the day Saturday feeling queasy, I am still very glad to have made the trip. Ethan, too, caught the bug, and that is my one regret that the poor guy was staying here in Arkansas with family when it hit him Friday night, leaving them to clean up the “mess” that comes along with a stomach virus. Thumbs down for that, but otherwise a good report. There is nothing concrete about us moving up there, but we can definitely see our family and lifestyle fitting in well with the area, and most importantly that the flexibility of a job at the bakery there for Chris would allow our family more quality time together and a better quality of life in general. Beyond that, though, it is too early to make any certain announcements. Definitely a neat little city with a great “vibe”, which we enjoyed if even just for a weekend.

Now we are faced with a few impending decisions – the first one being to give our notice and not renew our lease beyond next month (yikes!). I am finding this part difficult, despite all the complaints I have against this house, because in the end I came to this house to really make it my own and be here awhile. As I was cleaning these old wood floors and remember Ethan and I mopping together once and he said, “I know! It’s like we are giving the house a bath!” I sat on the front porch swing knitting and remember the first few weeks when Chris built and painted those “Mystery Purple” railings. Ethan and I always talked about blessing our house by keeping her clean, and when some one would get hurt because they were acting up we would joke that the old house was reminding us to be gentle on her and slow down. I have memories here in just one year, and in the end, as of right now, this old drafty moldy house is all I got. Transition and limbo and unknown are so much more difficult states of being to embrace than grounded, rooted, and established. I know that the roof over my head is NOT my home, in fact I was not even MADE for this world, but my insecurities cling to what’s familiar and has found it really hard to bite the bullet and actually leave this house, esp not knowing exactly when and to where. I know I need to dig in deep and gain some wisdom and perspective, and trust that when I Let Go, I will be carried in His Will.

2. The sun. Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun… The sun came out to play today, giving me time to hang two loads of laundry amidst a little crunch crunch from the lingering icy snow on the ground. The chickens couldn’t be happier to have water that didn’t freeze right away and plenty of fresh kitchen scraps to scratch around in. They even blessed us with 6 eggs this week (way to push through tough times, girls!) The kids, however, still deemed it too cold to hang in the yard with me, (those weak willed ruffians.)

3. Garlic. This may well have its own category because this little miracle bulb has really been helpful to me lately. You see, I get chronic sinus infections as well as a host of other inflammatory symptoms like itchy red patches of skin. I began drinking raw garlic tea and noticed how much quicker the sinus infection went dormant again. Then I read that in countries where they consume 10-12 raw cloves a day, garlic has been linked to reduced risk of cancer and a host of other diseases. I’ve since crushed a few cloves here and there through out the day, but my favorite is still that soothing tea. Now, before you go “GAHG!” let me walk you through the how-to and let you see for yourself how mellow this tea actually is: press 3 whole cloves of raw garlic in a mug. Wait 10-15 minutes for the good stuff to extract. Meanwhile, gently boil non-chlorinated water. Pour water over the garlic and add plenty of raw honey and fresh squeezed lemon. Once it cools enough to drink, sip it all and be sure to eat up the bits of garlic at the bottom. They are surprisingly delightful, not at all to pungent, this way. I’ve been able to stay on top of my sinus problems and my skin has been getting smoother each day. (I’ve also given up caffeine — yes, the former blogger of MamaNEEDJava! — and am watching things like alcohol and refined flours and sugars even more carefully – but that’s another post for another day).

4. Knitting. I know, I know, you can totally call my “duh” on this one but a list of my happy things would be not be complete without the noble mention of my favorite hobby. I’ve been feverishly finishing a layette for a good friend of mine’s baby shower tomorrow and the smooth organic cotton yarn has been a nice, effortless companion amongst a hard week of frigid temps, sick babies, and cabin fever. I’ll post pics soon (don’t want to spoil the surprise )

5. Damien Rice. Ohhhhhhh the Damien love is pumpin through my veins this week. The soulful harmonies with string and acoustic accompaniments – ugh- I… I’m without words, but not without tears. It’s moving, I tell ya.

6. Portlandia. The new show cracks me up and renews my heart for all things Portland. PDX love.

7. Beta fish. The re-homing and loss of our widdle kitty Paz last year has left a deep void that only owning another pet can fill. Alas, we are in way too much of a transitional phase in our lives to bring a furry critter along for the ride. But this week we got two beta fish (homed separately, of course) who floats their purdy wittle fins in graceful waves above natural river rock and spin circles around the living bamboo in their jar. Periodically they call a happy “Howdy” to the snails we bought to live with them (for real, its almost audible.) Not cuddle worthy, no, but entertaining and low-maintenance, yes. For now, that little space inside that longs for something alive to share our home with, (besides the constant stream of pests that try to take up residents here – the family of raccoons and the TWO venomous shrews we’ve captured), feels satiated.

8. A job. Today hubby finally moved from “temp” to a real bonafide job job within the company he’s been assigned to since September. While it’s not the career launching thing he is passionate about, it is slightly more security and slightly more pay, both of which contribute to slightly more peace of mind

9. Road trip plans. Chris and I are getting out of dodge next weekend for a quick trip up to Columbia, MO. We are scoping out the scene up there, seeing if we get that “home” feeling, and visiting with some sweet friends. Ver will come with, while Ethan will spend the weekend with his doting aunt, in the bliss of his older cousins full attention To say I CAN’T WAIT would be an enormous understatement. I’m already compiling playlists for our 5 hour drive… sooooo excited!

10. Annie Dilliard. Reading The Writing Life again. It always inspires me to dig deep and start the work of being a serious writer. Meh… we’ll see. Still, love her prose.

I leave you with a few more sweet moments this week: impression ornaments with homemade clay and rock photo/card holders, both inspired by GardenMama.

It is tough work, this life. Hanging up clothes on the line in the winter and staring down that pile of dishes that seems to magically transplant itself BACK in the sink every time I walk away from the kitchen. Sometimes I think, enough! there must be more to life than this! And indeed there is. But it’s there all the time, in the relationships, in the growth, in the stretch that burns. It’s in the clothes and the dishes and midnight nursing and the stir-crazy-lack-of-car thing and the oh-my-gosh-how-are-we-going-to-pay-the-bills thing.

It’s the endurance, the perseverance, the surrender, the trust in what you cannot see. Hard times come and hard times go. What else can I say? At least I haven’t been struck in the head by a dead bird

Instead, I bring you winter images that capture the heart of my life; the good, precious bucket fulls of grace and beauty all around me.

So yesterday, following a tip from my future landlord, we headed out to downtown Prairie Grove. Here we come across the best vintage flea market I have personally ever seen. Oh my. Ohhhh… my. I picked up some locally made lye soap, some hook rugs, a skin rug, local wool yarn for a knitting project, a step ladder for the kitchen, and then I look ahead and THERE. IT. WAS. :: Here I found my dream dining room table.-It is a looooong (12-15 seater) and thin wood table painted and distressed in a light blue/teal color. I mean, ya’ll – it is the table I have dreamed about for years. Once I pick up cheap, odd chairs I can’t live without at garage sales, and top with vases and buckets of fresh plants and candles, this table will complete a vision I have held for some time. It’s ideal for the long hardwood dining room, with bright orange walls and large old windows… ahhhhhh. Daisies and Olives has found a fan in me!!!

So today, again on the tip of my future landlord, we went down to N. Block St. It was like I stepped onto N. Denver in Portland, (pre-renovation), but with 5 of the best stores from Hawthorne and Alberta on it.

First up – the knit store! Yay! A local knit shop with open knit nights on Thursdays and a Pub Knit Night every other Tuesday at the bar next door. Cocktails and knitting – um, what? I’m SO there.

Next: Cross the street and walk into a local bead shop but with some funky hippie bags, clothes, incense, so on. I got a mustard yellow dread sized bead for .75 cents and met the owner – who happens to say, “You aren’t the family who is looking at a house my friend So and So is renting, are you?” Yep! That’s us! There’s that small town thing again! Turns out this woman has owned the bead shop for something like 18 years now. The place had some seriously cool stuff.

Head next door for lunch at my new favorite place to eat: The Little Bread Company. HUGE fans. My seared tuna sandwich was fantastic, as was my birthday slice of cheesecake. They bake everything fresh each day, in this little funky shop with a great atmostphere. The cashier was from Portland, lol. The owner came over and crouched down at our table and talked to us about all the places we need to check out here, giving me tips on a facebook group for progressive parents of fayetteville, etc. She told us about Terra Tots (cool natural children’s shop), Greenhouse Grille (local, sustainable restaurant), and some coffee shops. One of which is that whole in the wall drive through I told you all about yesterday. This place happens to be like .5 mile from our “future” rental so we decide we must check this out today (more on that coming later)…

But first: next door we enter Good Things Boutique- a shop for local, handmade, recycled, fair trade, etc fashions. Woo hoo! I hit a February sale and snatched up an adorable mustard yellow scarf (what is with me and mustard yellow lately?) with ruffles on the end! Oh, and a locally made feather hair clip – way cute. The owner again talked to me for a long time and gave me all these insider tips on things like food, yoga, etc. It was awesome!

We head out of N. Block to drive through Baba Boudan’s, the coffee shop we keep hearing could be right up our alley. So we’re waiting in the drive through and the young patron comes right out to our window to introduce himself. We tell him its our first time here and he gives us the shmeal: with pride he recounts that this is the first Fayetteville coffee shop ever, that his family has owned it for like 17 years and he began working there when he was 9! He was hilarious. He also tells us they roast their own coffee, about 60 some varieties!, most roasted by his mom! Music to our ears! We order our drinks and were not disappointed – this is the true coffee experience. Baba Boudan’s – who knew?!

From there we stopped into two other new favorites: Handmade and a Seafood Market. At Handmade the patron chats with me, tells me where to find the local leathersmith, tips me off to a great italian restaurant, showcases her new stock of pickled green beans and sends me on my way. But not before hinting to me that I need change the way I am saying things: “You aren’t finding a little bit of Portland in Fayetteville – you are finding Fayetteville in Fayetteville.” I blush. Sorry!

Maudi’s Seafood Market is another gem. Not super impressive upon first entrance, BUT get to talking with Maudi and you know you’re in the right place. The owner expresses her excitement in providing me with environmentally friendly seafood options and we chit chat about the documentary Food, Inc. and the book An Uncertain Peril. She stocked me up on crawfish tails, sushi grade tuna, and nori rolls. She STOPS me from buying pickled ginger from her: “They sent me the kind with Aspartame in it even though I asked them not to – but I can’t let you eat that!” LOL

What an adventure! And what a GREAT birthday! Even in the chilly February of the Ozark foothills, we are turning up rocks and finding treasures.

What impresses me about this town is the community. The owners are so happy to talk to you, to give you pointers, to welcome you. Every one shakes hands, introduces themselves, wants to be on a first name basis. They talk about the economy, the history of their shop, the history of the small city on the whole. They drop names: “Oh, come in for coffee in the mornings and I’ll introduce you to So and So, another mom you’ll LOVE and she can talk your ear off” or “Ask around about So and So, she does yoga classes out of her home and doesn’t charge as much as these other places”. They were all such interesting people and so warm, too.

This is more than a town with a dominate Walmart and chicken farm culture, that’s for sure. And those who are working hard to keep it “funky” are darn proud of it. They don’t want any yuppie Portlanders waltzing in like they know everything about everything (ha!). They take pride in their local roasters, breweries, sustainable farms, and farmers market (which I was told is impressive for a city of this size – I am now REALLY excited about the market that is returning to the city in just over a month). I am so pleased to have met so many local business owners and get a fresh taste of the local flavor – very sweet indeed.

We’ll have to check out that Terra Tots and Greenhouse Grille soon, along with a green building supply store we heard about for environmentally paint so we can get started on making the new rental feel like “home”

I have a feeling we are going to be learning a lot from this town…

Here’s my recap of the last 4 days and my initial impression of our new location:

First, the bad news. Cons:
1. Coffee shops. There are like… 3? I liked a mayan mocha I got at one place but the ambiance was a bit corporate looking (when compared to the thrift store furnished bungalow coffee shops or trendy mom cafe’s of Portland). Plus, I think I had more coffee shops within 2 miles from my last place as I do within the whole city of Fayetteville. The pastry/food offerings at one place was seriously lacking variety and the scones and breads were really too sweet. The other place, supposedly the trendy one on Dickson St., was actually fairly hoyty towty, with a full liquor bar and lunch menu – it was really more of a restuarant and not a family friendly one at that. Not to mention that our 3 coffee drinks and 3 desserts ran a bill of just under $40! Needless to say, I’m not returning there again! There is one more I need to try, or so I’ve heard. It’s more of a hole in the wall place with a drive through – which could mean is amazing, or terrible, lol. I haven’t come across a tea shop or a knitting store yet, though I’ve heard they exist.

2. Vintage stores. There are a few I still need to check out but they are in surrounding towns. The main one I’ve looked into in Fayetteville is decently priced and had a good assortment of vendors (I got a cute old metal trash can, a throw pillow and a book about edible gardening there for just a few dollars). Rather than one or two decent vintage stores in every neighborhood, there is like one in each city here – which makes it hard for a gal who adores “old” things to refurnish her new home Also, craigslist isn’t being used much here and people NEVER seem to delete postings once something is sold! Arg… Isn’t there a “Craigslist Best Practices” guide somewhere???

3. Food. Well, this isn’t a complete “Con”: I tried one restaurant and I really liked it – The Hog Haus Brewery. I had a good “Moldy Fungus” burger with mushrooms and blue cheese, as well as very tasty sweet potato fries. Decent prices too. They are one of the only (or only?) microbreweries in town and I found a few in the sampler that I really liked. Chris didn’t, though, since he is a Bitters fan and they don’t brew that variety. BUT aside from restaurants I am really shocked at how few natural grocery options there are. There is one, to be exact. And its actually good, I mean for a Co-op it has a good variety (though not so much on meats, from others I have seen) and I certainly would want to support a local co-op so we did join up right away. However, the prices. Oh my. A 5 lb bag of organic apples is over 5 dollars! So, as you can imagine, I’m putting in a VERY big order from Azure Standard next week so I can stock up on stuff for the month (or 6 months!) and reduce my need for expensive apples (they must have seeds made of gold or some hidden toy inside…)

4. Corporate chains. Wow… it’s been a long time since I’ve seen so many corporate chains on one 3 mile stretch of a road. I am grateful that this is balanced with a few “city center” streets that seem to be thriving, with many locally owned restaurants and shops (including a used bookstore or two). If I stick to those streets, I start to feel like I’m in my element again and get inspired by the LIFE that surrounds me.

And now for some good news – Pro’s:
1. Church. We did visit Vintage Fellowship on Sunday and by and large we felt welcomed and among friends. We will continue to check it out and get involved in a small group soon too.

2. Family. It sure is different to have extended family around! This is practically a first for us and so far so good!

3. Sights. We’ve barely begun to get around and view “The Natural State” (aka Arkansas) but some things even on our drive to and from town are really pretty. Being at my aunts, on the top of a hill on a wooded 30?40? acre lot offers us the opportunity to open up the windows on the second floor in the morning and let the sun in, look out over a peaceful setting of rolling hills. We’ve been up close and personal with a family of deers that live in these acres, as well as an armadillo that Chris tried his very hardest to catch. We plan to visit Devil’s Den state park and Wedington Lake state park in the coming weeks for caves, fishing, trail and creek walking…

4. A new rental home. We are pretty certain about a new rental home we found (landlord just needs to get utilities turned on to check that pipes didn’t freeze during a stow storm 2 weeks ago, then we sign). It is an old (100 or more?) craftsman home with original wood floors in 2 of the 3 bedrooms and the long living room/dining room. Many large, original windows with original trim line the living room – lots of light and character. The kitchen is roomy as well, albeit cheaper tile, old original cabinets, and small, outdated appliances (but hey – its just a rental). The main perks to the place is that it does offer a 3rd small bedroom, carpeted, which overlooks the backyard with a large window. It is a perfect office and craft room. The older, big living room is darling and even features an entire wall with built in cabinets and bookshelves on either side of a storage bench/seating area, all built around the street facing window. I can picture afternoons spent on cushions people watching, knitting and reading from that window nook. There is a small, (tiny) front porch too. In the back, there is a fenced backyard that is looooong and holds lots of potential, including a storage shed with shelves, lights and electricity that is ideal for my bulk food storage, as well as an old city ally way on the property that is built up with old mason stones and filled in with topsoil for a long raised garden bed. The landlord is also a perk: a self-proclaimed “old hippie” who gave us the thumbs up on 4 backyard hens, raised vegetable beds in the front and back yard, AND the a-okay if I decide to do a waldorf-inspired playschool from the home as side income. We also get to pick out new paint colors and get to work making the house “ours”. We currently have no pets in this home but something tells me it won’t take long before we do… we are going to give a lot of thought to this, however, since we have family members who suffer dander allergies. Anyway, we’ll know about all of that this week once the pipes are checked and we sign the lease. We’ll likely begin going over there with our stuff from the storage pod next week and begin painting and building the beds, compost, and chicken tractor. Also, the neighborhood looks really darling. It’s pretty much a historic neighborhood – lots of old characteristic homes and the mark of “young families” such as wagons on the front porch, etc. It’s only one mile from Wilson Park and walkable/bikable to Dickson St. The end of our road even has two expensive cutesy antique stores on it. Oh, did I mention that the monthly rent is exactly what we budgeted for? 650 a month! Yay! SO – our plan is to stay in this home until we have saved up more and established good credit again, so that in the coming year or two (or 3?), we will be in a better place to find a more permanent “home” plan.

5. The town. It certainly does have that “where everybody knows your name” Cheers feel. For example, a girl who was in my group at church (they broke us up into groups for a little prayer time) bumped into me the next day at the brewery for lunch. She was so sweet and gave me her card with her contact info. A new friend? Then, when checking out at the Co-op, I discovered that my cashier had just moved to Fayetteville from Portland in December! She told me that while she misses the THINGS in Portland, she likes LIVING here. She also gave me her contact info, as well as a lead on a volvo mechanic her parents swear by named Gary. Well, low and behold, today we purchased a 98 Volvo Wagon and looked up a volvo mechanic in Fayetteville – who pops up but Gary’s Volvo. Ha! THEN, I was asking our new/future landlord about vintage shops and she tells me about a place in Prairie Grove I should check out. I mention that I need to get out that way anyhow, as I had found a family farm on a website that is out that way who cited that they use Weston Price nutrition principles at their farm (i.e. “Nourishing Traditions”). My landlord says, “You aren’t talking about So and So, are you?” YES! The very one. She knew them because she lives in Lincoln and this family has a booth in the Lincoln Farmers Market. She gave me their father’s phone number and said we’d “love them”. It’s just too funny to be in a town small enough for these things to happen, that even towns 45 minutes away, every body seems to know every body. It’s pretty cool.

6. Potential mom friends. I joined a yahoo group for NWA Natural Parenting and already there is a fermentation class in the works, to be more or less demonstrated by Yours Truly. Folks already scramblin’ for my kefir grains and kombucha scobies, lol. In addition, one mom gave me a tip on some local natural whole frozen chickens purchased for a few bucks a pound through the local monastery. AND, one mom posted today asking for some one to split a gallon of raw coconut oil in her next order of Mountain Rose Herbs! What’s so neat about all of that is that knowing such like-minded folks are here is helping me feel more like I am in the right place. It isn’t prolific like it is in Portland, which does make you take it for granted less and work harder to find those “gems” of places and foods to support nearby. It’s valuable to be in new places, to learn new things, to be in a less homogeneous area and stretch your own notions and ideals and bla bla bla. I’m looking forward to the brown grass turning green and for color and life to return to these foothills, though. When I start seeing bulbed flowers, hummingbirds and honeybees, (the world around me all prettied up for Spring), I’m sure things will only get better.

In conclusion: in all of FOUR days we have been here, we have already felt welcomed and a part of this community. We are putting down roots to hold us here awhile, but look forward to visiting friends and family across states in the year to come.

In the meantime, I just might have to open my own coffee shop and bakery to feed my habit

Anyway, with all the curiosity I decided to post something I had come up with to give me meal plan ideas and so on. It’s an example of what foods would be consumed on an ideal day in my diet. (And I don’t mean diet as in “South Beach” or “Watch Watchers” but in the traditional sense of the word- i.e. “the food I eat”.) I’ve done an okay job with some of these for about a year now, and I’ve gotten more focused about it in the last week or so. This week I plan to be truly intentional because I’m feeling my body saying something like, “I need support; mayday, mayday!”

Example of my ideal diet:

Breakfast:
• 8 oz. homemade raw milk kefir smoothie blended with organic frozen fruit and 1 tbsp of raw unfiltered local honey
• 1 slice of bacon cooked in coconut oil in cast iron skillet, a poached farm-fresh organic egg (yoke unoxidized / runny) on top of a bowl of quinoa and kale, along with a variety of seasonal sautéed veggies(squash, mushrooms, green beans, onion, sweet potato, etc.), sprinkled with nutritional yeast (for a vitamin b complex, etc) and topped with local hot sauce (peppers are anti-inflammatory)
• 6oz. organic fair-trade coffee, 2 tbsp’s whole raw milk

Lunch:

• canned tuna or wild caught salmon (with bones and skin) on salad of leafy greens and veggies, with homemade dressings like EVOO and vinegar, etc
• a fermented cod liver oil supplement – dosage to provide me with at least 20,000 IU vitamin A (needs for nursing women) and comparable vit D support (5-10,000 IU)
• Strong tea of dandelion leaf and root, red clover, red raspberry leaf and nettle (which is a liver, kidney and uterine tonic for hormone balancing and gentle cleansing – as I can’t do a full on liver detox while nursing)

Dinners:

• Stews (bone broth, veggies, pieces of chicken, etc), quinoa bowls (soaked black beans over sautéed kale and quinoa, etc), baked or sautéed meat and veggies (curries!), stuffed peppers, soaked legumes/beans/grains in moderation (quinoa or brown rice, lentils, etc)

Light or In-between meals and desserts:

• a baked sweet potato with skin and butter and raw honey on top
• celery with all natural no sugar peanut butter (ingredients should be peanuts, with or without salt), or raw tahini (almond butter)
• handful of mixed nuts (esp raw almonds)
• stove popped popcorn in coconut oil with nutritional yeast and sea salt (“real salt” brand for minerals)
• steamed edamame in the pod with sea salt
• Occasionally a small baked good, made without refined white flour or sugar.
• Kale chips (kale baked in extra virgin olive oil and sea salt)
• Seasonal variety of fruits and veggies (carrot sticks, sweet bell peppers, cucumber, baked sweet potato “fries”, etc.)
• Fresh, plain whole yogurt with some fruit, cinnamon, and raw unfiltered honey
• raw milk steamer (raw milk warmed on stove with raw honey, cinnamon, cardamon, nutmeg, cloves, fair trade organic powdered cocoa and homemade vanilla extract)



Not allowed:

• sugars– which is in everything from cereals to bars to breads to ketchup to peanut butter these days… (oh, and this includes every type of sweetener except raw honey – and even that can be too much of a good thing — I have to remind myself! lol I have been using Xylitol in small amounts here and there as well, like if I want a touch of sweetness to my coffee)
• refined processed foods (most things that are prepackaged, preprepared, etc fall into this category)
• empty carbs (refined white flour pastas, breads, scones, bagels, fruit juice, yogurts, baked goods, white rice, etc – this stuff WILL mess with your insulin and WILL make you store fat. Period. Tip: If something says “fat free” or “light” on the package, its a good idea to puke on it. Or put it back on the shelf, whatever.)
• trans fats (like hydrogenated vegetable oils) (fast food is a duh)
• foods with soy and corn additives (high fructose corn syrup, soy lecithin, so on)
• basically anything that is not a “whole food” or was not made with strictly whole, natural foods. If you can’t read the ingredients, you are better off not eat it (this includes “healthy” cereals, salad dressings, you name it). Look at nutrition labels and know what you are eating. Bonus: eating whole foods (organic or fresh and local when you can) is NOT more expensive than prepackaged NON-food when you actually look at it pound for pound unit comparison.
• In summation, give your body what it was made to consume. Food. Just food. Kinda easy to remember, heh?

of course, plenty of water is always a good idea as well

To add to my nourishing diet I am hoping to strengthen my body physically. This week I have 3 practice jogs for 30 minutes each before the big race (5k, lol) on Sunday for Race for the Cure. But my goal is to also begin to develop a backyard obstacle course with things like ropes, tires, a soccer ball, orange cones, so on, that I can run through several times a day with Ethan. In addition, I’ll be starting a yoga class.

So if my connection cooperates, I’ll be posting the pics tomorrow, stay tuned!

Verity letting me know that she has the hiccups, so PUT DOWN THE DARN CAMERA!

Here is a snapshot of a very common day:

This morning I awoke to my son telling me he went into the trail mix and dumped the whole bag out in his room. I nursed, changed, and dressed Verity, then Ethan sang to her while I got dressed (this is our morning routine). I put her in her moby wrap so I could manage making breakfast for us. I worked a few hours while Ethan ran a circus in my room, pulling off my bedding, dropping rice cake crumbs everywhere, and finding my stash of cough drops so he could incessantly ask me if he could have one while giving his best phony coughing.

At long last, we ventured out to get out of the house, something I TRY to do the middle of each day, be it a homeschooling “field trip”, or storytime at the library, or (since we are on “summer break” from homeschooling while Verity is little) – a simple park adventure.

A coffeehouse called Posies opened around the corner 2 weeks ago that I’ve been excited to try, so we headed there first for some iced tea on this very sunny day. Upon arrival, Ethan’s eyes grew wild and hopeful as he points to a chocolate muffin in the pastry case. Being in good spirits, I make my first mistake. I tell him he can have the muffin if he firsts eats a sandwich: Almond butter, organic jelly, and whole wheat bread- $3! This place is pretty rad! OH- and I should add that they boast a small kids playroom with GLASS WINDOW for viewing your rugrat darling while in the comfort of the semi-quiet, cutesy seating area. Talk about MAMA-FRIENDLY!

What follows is a tale of “I don’t LIKE this!” and “I don’t want to eat the CRUST – EW!” and so on- the rantings of a spoiled 4 year old whose random bouts of pickiness with food hits at the most inopportune times! I repeated 100 times that he needs to finish the darn sandwich, my blood pressure is rising while Verity is not fully sleeping, kinda half crying but not wanting to nurse and Ethan is smearing almond butter across his face and subsequently his forearm to “clean” his face.

Things escalate to me having to take the muffin to go (because I made the mistake of paying for it in the beginning and he is clearly NOT finishing this sandwich!) and Ethan standing on his chair SCREAMING and CRYING that he wants the muffin and “PLEASE DON’T LET DADA EAT MY MUFFIN, THOUGH!!!!” I remain calm on the outside (you know how it is) but take him to the bathroom for some stern reprimanding while I have to literally bite my knuckle to keep from screaming myself. AHHHH! The stress of children. I tell Ethan that I cannot handle him today and we are going home, not to the park as planned. And that we are not leaving this bathroom until he stops crying. (Smooth move, emotion-coaching mom. Note the sarcasm.)

Ethan hangs his head low while we leave the restaurant. He loads himself heavily onto his bike to go home. A woman compliments his “cool bike” and I ask him to say “thank you” but he won’t. I ask him why and he says, “I can’t say thank you right now, I am just TOO sad.”

Okay, my heart is softening at this point. Yes, a minute ago he was screaming at the top of his lungs about a muffin. But now he is my little boy who not only doesn’t get the muffin, he doesn’t get the park either. Okay, okay. I can do this.

At the light, we could turn left to go home, or right to the park. I tell him to go right. When we are literally IN THE PARK, he stops and asks what we are doing there, “I thought we were only going home?!” We talk it out. We talk about him behaving poorly in the restuarant and not always getting what he wants. We talk about me getting too stressed about it in the bathroom and how both of us made mistakes but we can work on it and we can still love each other. He holds my hand and tells me he loves me so much. I feel so proud of him.

We spend two hours at the park, me sitting with Verity under the shade of a big tree. She loves the sounds and sights and just stars off quietly into the blurry space around her. Ethan strips down to his shorts and runs around in the water works, chats up other moms until they have to ignore him- as usual, and rides his bike around the trail in front of me. At some point I cave with the muffin too- we split it under the tree – I weigh the experience of enjoying the muffin with him for the poor nutrition and inconsistent parenting. Oh well. Ya do the best ya can, right?

Back at home, I am typing while he is taking a shower with his toys, he has been in there 45 minutes with some sort of imaginary story and lots and lots of singing going on. I love him. He is so unique, he tries so hard, and we expect so much of him. But he is a really, really awesome kid.

And how lucky am I? I’ve now got another one growing up into a great kid too. As I write, Her Half-pint Highness is sound asleep in her wrap with her mouth hanging open, and I can only imagine all of the mistakes she and I will make with each other and all of the conversations about behaviors and forgiveness we will have.

Okay, I guess I’ll wrap this up since its approaching 1000 words, sheesh.

Verity’s first “cooing” is happening this week.

The Portland homefront is doing well, tight on $, but well. (We decided to go in the backyard this week to chop the top off a small evergreen because we can’t afford a christmas tree this year, which isn’t the worst thing in the world. Scratch that, we realized we have no saw! ) So far, our backyard has supplied the bulk of our holiday decorating, and its actually really fun! A door swag, a centerpiece, and some stairway garland, pretty cool. Even with our “buy less, love more” desire for Christmas, there’s still this part of me that feels guilty if I don’t have SOMETHING under the tree or in Ethan’s stocking. He has a gift from grandma to open, of course (though we realized its a DVD and we don’t currently own a DVD player! Scratch that- an angel brought us a DVD player ) And I will probably get some oranges in my produce bin that week to put in his stocking. I know its all the same to him, it’s just my own feelings about not getting him some super cool fire truck or something, lol. The good news is that our bills will be paid, and we’ll be going to Florida a few weeks later, so it’s all worth it!

It is somewhat surreal for people of my generation to truly grasp the idea of not having a surplus. We do pray together every night for continued provision, so we can live paycheck to paycheck until we’ve paid our dues, so to speak. Last month, we began to to do a lot more random meals at home, like black beans and rice or lentil stew. Last night, the hearty cuisine was straight from the produce bin: sauteed potatoes, kale, and carrots (you won’t believe how good it actually was! When a 3 year old will eat all of his kale and your husband wonders why there are no “seconds”, you know you’ve scored (or they’re in cohorts to make you think you have!).

It is all very good to do, but boy are there times that I feel like there is a wild animal in me wanting to get to any place with a peppermint mocha or similar “treat”. I figure I’m addicted to three things when that happens: caffeine, sugar, and spending. But I try to stay encouraged here and there for the progresses we have made, such as our dependence on a vehicle. It has been ONE YEAR since we have gone completely carless, using mass transportation, bikes, car-sharing programs, and good ol’ fashioned legs to tote our family of 3 (almost 4!) around the city. It has actually been easier than I thought it would be, esp once we learned to rely less on mass transportation (waiting 20 minutes at night for a bus to take us 1 mile was a pain in the rear, but we did it all the time when we first tried this last year. At this point, we expect to do a LOT more walking, and take the bus less than once a week, which is much better.) There are times I can’t STAND it, like the times about once a month that I miss an appointment or event at church because of our lack of vehicle (which usually is really about our lack of planning or money – for the bus or a zipcar). But when I remember that even with our previous car completely paid off, we saved $2,400 this year on the cost of insurance and gasoline! (That’s a hefty amount in our income bracket!) Imagine getting a 2,400 tax break, would you pass it up? (BTW, Obama- you should provide ENORMOUS incentives in tax breaks for those who have gone carless. I mean, come on!)

The best we can hope for is God’s continued provision for our most basic needs, while honing in the spending, the grocery bill, the frequency of counseling, the frequency of preschool, etc. We know it builds character to pay your bills, pay down your debt, one paycheck at a time, if at all possible. When we do the right thing, it always seems to work out (like selling hubby’s xbox for plane tickets, which was our only dvd player, and then last night the 3 of us got to snuggle under a blanket and watch Charlie Brown christmas special on network television -with our antenna, lol). When times are tough, it usually brings the family together to think of more creative and meaningful things to do together, so I really have a lot to be thankful for.

I will be picking up my last small paycheck today until after the New Year, so I only expect it to get even more bleak as the holidays approach, but I trust that it will work out. Can’t you tell I’m being very optimistic?! (All that counseling is paying off, LOL)

Adios for now -